I've heard there's software that will go through all your tweets and tell you if you should delete some of them. It searches for words and phrases that might indicate naughtiness (naughtiness like, you know, being a bigot) and collects all these bad tweets up so you can go through hitting delete and hiding what a horrible person you were five years ago.
I suppose the motivation to selectively delete your past self from the internet, rather than going full tilt and deleting everything as soon as it becomes, say, two years out of date and the prejudices you hold have moved on, is so as to not seem suspicious. If a person can find no online content for you at all, do they assume something worse than if they were to find out you once used #vivelavulva? Almost definitely. If I can't find someone's Twitter account I assume they're in prison for murder.
Not that I'm as hooked on Twitter as I once was (I previously had no need for the "what you've missed" feature because I never missed anything). My bad habit at the moment is going on WhatsApp during the rest periods of turbo sessions. The problem is you can't turn it off. I used to uninstall Instagram from my phone as an easy way to stop myself aimlessly scrolling through nonsense, but you can't do that with people's main way of contacting you.
And I'm super-weak. As soon as a rest period hits in my turbo session, even though I know it'll get me distracted and agitated, into my back pocket I go rummaging for my phone.
The reason it's in my back pocket in the first place is because I use it for music, and that's how I'm going to fix this. I've bought a music player I can download my Spotify playlists onto, so I can use that on the turbo and hide my phone away in another room. No will power required, hurrah! Rest periods will still be furiously sweaty trying to type out gossip in WhatsApp before my timer runs down.
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Hi. I'm Cycling Weekly's Weekend Editor. I like writing offbeat features and eating too much bread when working out on the road at bike races.
Before joining Cycling Weekly I worked at The Tab and I've also written for Vice, Time Out, and worked freelance for The Telegraph (I know, but I needed the money at the time so let me live).
I also worked for ITV Cycling between 2011-2018 on their Tour de France and Vuelta a España coverage. Sometimes I'd be helping the producers make the programme and other times I'd be getting the lunches. Just in case you were wondering - Phil Liggett and Paul Sherwen had the same ham sandwich every day, it was great.
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