As we approach the shortest day of the year, you know what will keep our collective spirits up?
Nope, not the warm embrace of a loved one, or the companionship of friends and family, but the drip, drip, drip of serotonin from doom-scrolling on Twitter until the sun has well and truly set, which at the moment is around just after you finish lunch.
In case you missed any tweets as your eyes glazed over due to the endless infinity of the internet, here’s a round-up of the best bits from this week.
No, no, don’t thank me, no need for statues or medals, I’m simply just doing my job.
1. Even though the Telegraph couldn’t get Geoghegan Hart’s name right, glad to see they absolutely nailed the pronunciation of ‘Paris’
How to (very very badly!) pronounce a strange list… this is NOT perfect, sorry telegraph. Drinking game if you can include all these words in your Christmas 🎄dinner family conversation?
But please don’t say my name like that 🤨🤢 – 3 extra shots if you say TIE-oh x pic.twitter.com/FtULfaddmo
— Tao Geoghegan Hart (@taogeoghegan) December 11, 2020
2. 2000CHF fine to Luke Rowe for being gross
After a chicken vindaloo 💨
— Luke Rowe (@LukeRowe1990) December 11, 2020
3. Your weekly dose of cute to make you feel like the world is ok for a couple of minutes
What better inspiration during your training session than your biggest fan?
Repost @Davide_Marti93 pic.twitter.com/uXO376FJP2— Garmin Cycling (@GarminCycling) December 4, 2020
4. Destined to be a hit with non-cycling family members
De kerstboom staat.
Of ik hem ook even wilde versieren. ✅ pic.twitter.com/Xy3la10Zkd
— Bram Tankink (@bramtankink) December 9, 2020
5. Don’t know about you but I’d hate to be whoever Vernon is right about now
Vernon mate, come on
— Geraint Thomas (@GeraintThomas86) December 4, 2020
6. The off-season soon gets to everyone in the cycling world
Just popping to Poundland for some Lynx Africa 24hr protection roll on deodorant if anyone needs anything? #Life
— Matt Stephens (@RealStephens) December 11, 2020
7. To be honest the only way to stop Deceuninck – Quick-Step winning would probably be to make them wear denim
Wait a minute, is that Denim!!! @deceuninck_qst pic.twitter.com/97MNcFtuim
— Simon Warren (@100Climbs) December 11, 2020
8. Err…delicious…???
The Souvlaki sleeve 🌯 pic.twitter.com/sUAowf1w5I
— SamBewley (@SamBewley) December 10, 2020
9. Doctor Hutch with the galaxy brain method of not crashing
Avoid crashing on slippery winter roads by buying a very expensive pair of cycling tights and then never ever wearing them.
— Michael Hutchinson (@Doctor_Hutch) December 5, 2020
10. Equivalent to cycling around the Earth nearly 20 times
Made a rough estimation of Davide Rebellin¨s total kms in the saddle (races and training rides) from August 1992 (when he turned pro) to this day.
700,000 – 800,000 km. https://t.co/6NkoLX8MGk
— ammattipyöräily (@ammattipyoraily) December 10, 2020
We’ll be back next week with more pure fire tweets from the world of cycling