Tweets of the week: UAE Tour special, if that can even be a thing

As I prepare to moan about the UAE Tour for the entirety of this intro I hold little concern that anyone will object, save those employed in an official capacity to care about the Middle Eastern stage race.

While people hold Very Strong™ opinions on the idea of sportswashing, otherwise known as protestation against any race held east of Turkey, you don't even need to dig that deep.

Firstly, what a waste of time and money getting helicopter cameramen for aerial views of what is effectively a car park in a desert inhabited by Instagram influencers. Secondly, the level of racing and the seriousness with which it's taken by the riders allows for Jasper Philipsen to dismount his bike and run alongside the peloton mid-stage.

Maybe you disagree, maybe I'll soon be picked up by Emirati security agents and disappeared for my wanton insolence. I wonder if the Cycling Weekly travel budget extends to a rescue mission...

PS: We've also got some Tour du Rwanda tweets in there as a remedy.

1. I think everything should be measured in terms of the 2020 Italian Olympic track team from now on

2. Lads lads lads, beer beer beer

3. Couldn't have put it better myself

4. Didn't have Jasper Philipsen down as a physical comedy guy, I'll correct my notes

5. Maybe Tadej Pogačar and I aren't so different after all

6. The Sky money was that good huh

7. Got to admit, didn't see this one coming

8. This spot is reserved for the wholesome actually good tweet of this week

9. I've spent at least five minutes trying to come up with a pun combining a famous artist and the beach and have now lost interest so this caption will have to do instead

10. Need to see UAE Team Emirates versus a Rugby 7s team in a combined-discipline mega championship

We'll be back in a week's time with more passably humorous tweets.